The Dilemna of Colors

So its official. I belong to the older generation!!!! Now I understand the implication of what my mom used to mean when she said ‘ the definition of everything of this generation is different from ours’. What life altering incident jerked me into realizing this you would ask!!! Lemme explain….

Last week I was feeling particularly blue and to beat the blues I usually pull a friend of mine and go shopping. Me and my friend walk into a clothes store. I was in a mood to buy a pink dress and was determined that I would pick up whatever pink attire I would get. So the store assistant runs up to us…eager to show the store collection.

“We are looking for something in pink”

The guy thinks a little….searches his mind as though we were talking Greek and replied,

“Sorry, we have nothing in those colors”

“Would you perhaps have a shade closer to pink?”

This time the store assistant promptly replied with confidence…. “No! Absolutely not”

“Can we perhaps look around?”

“Feel free”

So with broken hearts and fallen crests….we decided to look around ourselves….and then on one of the most prominent racks…we found a display of a number of pink dresses and shirts….. we felt red with anger and hailed the store assistant

“Look at these colors”…..

“Yes", he said, "These are Blush”

 Now this piece of information just came out of the blue for us

 “Oh, This is not pink?”

“No ma’am….its blush”

 Now this put us all in a grey area. My entire schooling seemed a lie at this moment.We argued for a while till the store assistant got browned off …finally my friend and I just waved the white flag and walked off without picking the coveted and much debated pink dress.

It was time I revisited my education….so I rushed to my friend who is a primary school teacher. She belongs to my generation, deals with the new generation, and considering she teaches 5 years olds….she would definitely be the authority in naming colors!!! Turns out pink is not the only color that got a name change. This is what I learnt…

• Red is vermillion (Isn’t red just much more of a simpler word, easier to spell as well???)
• Orange is Carrot (Ah! I guess this is an effort to push this generation towards healthier foods!!Good effort, I must say)
• Yellow is now known as Canary (That’s a bird color!! So was the bird named after the color or the color named after the bird…..the age old chicken or egg dilemma)
• Green is Military (Is this an effort to gear the new generation up towards a more violent world??)
• Light Blue is Carolina (Now that’s a name of a country….am not sure if that’s politically correct)
• Dark Blue is Indigo (Ah!!This one was at least there on the rainbow color list when I was learning colors)
• Violet is now known as Jazzberry Jam (Jam I know…but is there a kind of fruit called jazzberry…..or is the name after the Dance? But then dances don’t have specific colors attached to it? Totally confused!!)
• Beige is Khaki (Indianisation of the world? Or globalization of Indian products?)
• Black is kohl (that’s the third instance of indianisation of the world…..or globalization of Indian products)
• Mauve is lavender (I think I will have no issues remembering that one)
• Brown is Liver (Yuck!!! Getting reminded of an internal organ while choosing colors is just gross!!!!!)
• White is Snow (Will Snow White be now called Snow Snow? Or White White???)

Thanks to my updated friend…there is no more color confusion and things are as clear as black and white….er …..kohl and snow!

You can have any color you want, as long as it is RED!!!

I have always been a very big patron on nude pastel lipstick shades. Pinks, light browns and peach were always on my top favorite lipstick colors. Only tell last week. Last week, on my way to office, I saw this new hoarding with seven supermodels which includes the likes of Aishwarya Rai, Frida Pinto, Sonam Kapoor etc. These seven extremely glamorous women were flaunting seven different shades of amazing red lipsticks and were all looking stunning in them. The ad in itself was about the new range of reds that the company was offering and convinced me that not only was I totally worth it but that I could carry them off confidently as well.

So, here I was at the age of 25, when I realized that my whole life’s orientation towards pale colors for lipsticks were absolutely wrong. Red was the color that I needed to flaunt, and red was the color that would express my personality to the extent that it needed to be. Quite obviously, I needed my gang of girls to be with me during such a poignant moment and discussing the pros and cons of it all. Moreover, during this critical turning point of my life I would need my friends to be around to guide me through this transition smoothly right! So I called an emergency meeting for the weekend. My Agenda- Code Red!

We met at the regular lounge. Once everyone was assembled, I told them about my new found self discovery in the red lipstick. While everyone agreed that this was a positive change, my friends seemed to be more bothered with the whys and the hows of it all. What had got me so oriented towards red? So one pal from the gang, who was currently taking a sabbatical from work, finally opened up. It turned out that she was taking the sabbatical for her research on paranormal activities, precisely the science of possession. It was her opinion that this ‘red fetish’ as she called it (I personally do not like her calling this momentous change in my orientation as a mere fetish) was because apparently some vampire from the 12^th century (or did she say 2^nd centuries???) had taken control of my mind. She opined that such possessions begin with the desire for red on the lips and then evolves into a want for blood in the mouth. As of now my desire was only for the red on my lips….i can think of blood when it bothers me….i dont care if it evolves into blood thirst. Another friend of mine who had already established a name in the world of Psychology, had a contrary opinion.To her, this was no out of the world task, rather a very inside my head ‘disturbance’.  Her opinion was that I was finally evolving into the middle age. Apparently, women who have relished pastels all their lives, display a tendency towards brighter shades, when they get menopausal. The likes of Rekha and Jaya Bacchan were a part of this trend. Well, if my friend was even suggesting that I had reached my menopausal stage at 25, I could gurantee that I could send her to her deathbed very soon. What my psychological friend tried to explain to me was that while it took Rekha and Jaya, 50s to reach the I love red lipstick stage, I had a much more evolved brain, which is why I am already there at a much younger stage. Bravo, for working out such an amazing theory but I still needed my share of red lipstick and someone would have to go to the store with me to pick the right one

So on the auspicious Sunday, I went off to the nearby mall, to pick my shade…..[to be continued]

OK,so me and my guy broke up.its ok ...no big deal,i mean everybody breaks up!wats new?and the best part of my break up was that it wasnt a very long relation...jst 2 years...nothing compared to how people survive aftr breaking up a 15 years marriage!and i was always careful...always was prepared for the worst...then why does this hurt so much?it wasnt working out for a long time!he was taking me for granted!so now i am better off without him.NO expectations being unfulfilled!No worries for the phone not ringing!No insecurities about him!Yet i feel like down in the dumps!is it becoz i feel lonely?no reason for that.i have numerous great freinds!

it surprised couple of friends when i told them i joined a gym.actually am blessed with gods grace or devils curse(however you may see it) with a high BMR:).so i dont have the perpetual problem of fat accumulation in the wrong places,neither does something that touches momentarily my tongue settle permanently on my hips.neither am i a health freak or looks conscious person.... so y did i join the gym.well it so happened that i took up a part time job on a temporary basis.my boss there,i noticed was pretty mean to me(yeah whats the deal???all bosses are mean)well mine was particularly mean to me. i later noticed that she was particularly sarcastic about my weight.it went to the limit that she totally brought in obscure references about it.like that day as i was drinking water from the office fountain she was just passing by and said"i y do u need to come here,u can always bring your water in ur extremely deep collarbone dent"!!!!!wasnt that dumb!!!!yeah and lame too.but shez my boss!later i found her she was stalking me. Apparently she was trying to find out what exactly my lifestyle was.... so to get rid of her i decided , i would have to put on a lot of calories.....so i joined the gym for the purpose!

my take on independance day...

As the morning Independence Day special episode was done, I went over to the make up room to freshen myself up. Since this was a national holiday, there was a sense of ease in the otherwise rush hour of the make up room. Quite obviously, there was ample scope of gossip and discussions. Taking this opportunity, one of my colleagues from the news department asked me….. “Do you think we are really independent?”


Every year on 15th August, this is the ‘in question’. Come independence day and most people have this question on the tip of their tongues. I am sure all of you must have faced this question from neighbors, friends, colleagues, schoolmates, college union leaders, politicians (particularly those in the opposition parties). I had in fact once been asked this question from a stranger in the public bus!!!


Do you think we are really independent?

Quite obviously this question is primarily asked in a rhetoric tone, and your expected answer is ‘no’. The person asking this question asks it with ready arguments on how the country is not independent and we are still chained in the shackles of poverty, population, bureaucracy, corruption and so many other ills of society.

Well, I am writing this note for the benefit of all those who have ever asked me this question and would ask me the same on the coming years. This is an endeavor to spare their efforts as well as mine.

Are we really independent? Are we really better off than what we were a 100 years back? I believe we are. The argument that most people would come up with is that our society is not letting us breathe. It is corrupt and we are under the thumbs of the handful of powerful. Well true. But as a student of sociology, I have studied societies through time and over space. There is no society where these problems do not persist. As Rousseau put it, ‘Man is born free, but is in chains everywhere’.

Then what was the point of the freedom movement? What was the point of independence? Well, if you really understood the pulse of the society then you would know that back in those days when India was not independent, there was no right whatsoever. Today I have my own rights. I have the choice to use my rights. I have the independence to be independent. I can live my life in my own terms. I can choose the ideals that I would like to live by. And most importantly I have the right to criticize as long as I am not hurting anyone. And therefore I believe I am better off than someone who lived a 100 years back.

One of my colleagues actually pointed out that there is no real point of criticism as that does not lead to any constructive change. Although his argument makes sense, I would again like to point out on another basic fact of society. One of the most powerful agents of change is public opinion. Not just in democratic societies, but also in archaic monarchical society. And this opinion is form through public discourse. This might be from private drawing rooms to public street corners.The shisha bars, the pubs, the taverns, the theatres, the rocker theks have all served the purpose of public discourse. And most importantly what makes us or at least me, aware of the subjectivity of the events around me are these conversations. That I can carry on this these conversations is what I am grateful to those freedom fighters.

The day we won the cup again

5 hours before the match: I walk into my office. Most of my colleagues have reached and there is an atmosphere of suppressed enthusiasm. Since my desk directly faces the entry point of the office, I actually get to read everyone’s expression when they walk in. Every one in the office is tense, nervous and excited. There are suppressed smiles and giggles, and bottled up enthusiasm. Even the HR head, who is generally very serious is all excited.

4 hours before the match: everyone has more or less settled in. Talks and jokes about the world cup are on. Everyone is checking on their lucky signs and mascots. While some are wearing faded t shirts which should have been disposed off 10 years ago, but have been preserved due to some random coincidence. There are others who have worn their lucky shoes and lipstick. In fact, there was one colleague who had donned a horrible hue of fluorescent orange lip color which was not suiting her at all. For a second I actually hoped that India would lose, so that she would dispose of that lipstick. But that was just a reaction of a mind in shock of orange lipstick. I take pride in my ability of regain composure, and after 5 seconds I was back to supporting India again.

3 hours before the match: Some colleagues just remembered that they had missed their lucky objects back home. This earned them genuine dirty looks from all of us around. Their respective reporting officers were extra mean to them. After all this was not as casual as missing out certain targets set by the company. This was something that the whole country depended on.

2 hours before the match: The chairman of our channel walks in. CRAP!!!!! This cannot be good. He is never here on a Saturday. This means that there is now way we can watch the match, unless he leaves really early!!! Besides, the excitement is gradually taking the form of impatience. Not a good time to get into anyone’s way. Ours is a broadcast media with 3 channels being broadcasted simultaneously, with two news channels. While I work for the lifestyle channel where we can afford a comparatively chilled out schedule with breaks for the match, the people in the newsroom cannot. This makes them doubly impatient. NO one right now is daring to visit the newsroom right now.

1 hour before the match: People have abandoned all appearance of work. It is high time that proper food and snacks are retrieved for the purpose of the match. News of other channels setting up giant screens in their premises have left us swearing. Our office provides us with the most miniscule TVs that would put nano technology to shame. Complaint to the systems departments are pouring in about slow internet connections. All are interested in watching live internet streaming on their personal screens. As if that was not bad, the rumors of our rival channels distributing free jerseys to their employees are doing the rounds. And that blasted channel does not even have any program worth watching even if it were for the purpose of saving one’s life.
PS: the desk of our channel’s executive producer is just beside mine. She is entitled to a TV of her own which streams programs faster than other TVs….i am gonna have a ball watching this match.


The toss: The whole office is following closely the toss. We have got to win this. After all we have been winning all the winning match tosses….this is kind of like our lucky symbol. The sides have been called out and the coin thrown to the air. Results are out! India wins the toss!!! The whole office has broken into a monkey dance till the controversy comes up. Apparently the sides were not heard properly, therefore the coins has to be tossed again. WTF!!! That’s not happening. The coin gleefully enjoys the extra attention as the whole nation (my colleagues being a slice of the nation). The verdict is out and India has lost the toss!!! The whole office starts cursing ear specialists all over the world. Whats the whole point of ear treatment anyway, if it cannot treat the strategically important ears of the world!!!!!! Sri Lanka chooses to bat!

The First Inings: The match begins. Work is officially over today. In fact our chairman who never gets involved in these supposed ‘frivolities’ have also switched on his personal 21 inch TV. People in the newsroom are trying their level best to contain their frustration and maintain composure. India is playing quite well…..In fact the fielding is par excellence. Everyone is happy. Sreesanth is playing…..his hair is junglier than ususal….which we are hoping is a good sign!!! Although, there are no other signs of him being Samsung.

The game proceeds. The after 2 wickets, Sri Lanka, picks up pace. With the captain at the middle order the run rate is going up pretty quick. With sreesanth bowling, the run rate going in our favor. Curses directed towards Mahi the Indian captain for taking in sreesanth is going louder. In the mean time snacks and cold drinks have been brought into the office. Tea served as well. Sri Lanka is playing fabulously and India has lost its alertness!!!!

The end of the first innings: Sri lanka has set a really high score. 274!!!!The last ball shot was a classy sixer! The innings end at the end of our office hours. Our chairman who is a man of few words says that this is indeed a tough score for us to score. This makes us all paranoid. He hardly says anything to us. And when he does…..this is what he says Every one needs to rush out as there are hardly any transport facilities that are available.

Journey during the break: I hardly get any transport to my place. But today, of all days that I decide to go to a friends place, all the transport facilities seem to lead to my home. I finally manage to get a transport to the friends house. I encounter a number of people who have got their faces painted.

2nd innings: I reach her place when the 2nd innings have begun already. The screen is nothing but a horror show. One wicket is down already. All my friends seem to be engrossed in the game. There is one crazy dude in our gang who always has a camera in hand clicking pictures away to glory. Today even his attention was directed to the screen. In fact there were a number of random pics clicked of the screen trying to capture sachin’s shots. Needless to say, that they were of no avail. (PS: I am a very concerned friend and I made it a point to mail him some of the match moments downloaded from the internet. Run rates bad and Sehwag has hardly made any contribution.


With the loss of Tendulkar, Indian crickets little master (not little any more), the whole feel enthu of the party has gone down. We start taking in bottoms up shots with the hope that they really act as a wonder. The shots don’t seem to make much difference to the players. Of course there is a considerable difference made to the temperaments of my friends. A friend called in to say he did not feel like joining in the party. Crap!!!! He was supposed to drop me home. Now my team is not just going to lose but I will have no means of getting back home. A number of members of our gang could not take the stress anymore and went to puff it out through cigar. Somehow this worked pretty well and the run rate started to pick up.

End of Innings: Gambhir was out at 97. I was so hoping that he would get a century this match but alas. But mahi did a good job by picking up the run rate. The innings ended with a spectacular shot by the captain and we won!!!


Our little celebration: WE have won. We start dancing like crazy and then take two additional shots. I have to reach home. Its already one. My friend managed to make it back to the party and I have my promised drop home. The roads are all crazy! People are celebrating every where. There are processions which are heading towards direction that is unknown. Every one seems to be hugging each other. The party animals are out with their cars. Most of them are standing on the seat of their cars with half of their bodies out of the windows. Those people who generally sit and beg are dancing in joys. Their usual bodily disabilities which is the supposed to be the source of our sympathy is forgotten. The boy with the broken legs is dancing most enthusiastically and the usually blind boy is smiling at every one who passes by. The whole world is rejoicing about the cup that is finally ours. And it is all thanks to Pranab Mukerjee, our finance minister in 1983 and 2011.

Interpreting the world

The stories of the UFOs and ETs have forever been one a very popular source of entertainments. There are many who get flowed by the whole concept of life existing beyond the planet earth. Some of these stories have been clubbed under the banner of horror stories where these UFOs take over or maybe science fiction, where the logic of science is stretched with more flexibility of a rubber band. It is a well known fact that rubber bands sold these days are of the lowest quality available.

Coming back to ET, my take on these are that I completely believe in the existence of life beyond. The Earth is not just one of the planets in the Milky Way; it is in fact much more important than that. It is the asylum for the whole universe. All those poor souls who seem to have lost their minds for some unfortunate traumatic experience, those who are born whacko, or those who have taught their logic to run in the direction opposite to that of the majority are sent to the earth for treatment. Those souls are deported to the earth and therefore we have the wonderful patchwork of weirdoes living together under the banner of one united world.